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Theresa Nash

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Theresa Nash

Tag Archives: writing

Memories

07 Monday Oct 2024

Posted by Theresa Nash in General, Self-publishing

≈ 3 Comments

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indie authors, life, school, self-publishing, writing

My old grade school and church in Waterloo, Iowa is up for demolition. I attended school there for eight years and went to mass almost every day – Saturdays, sick days, summer vacation weekdays excluded. The wedding of our favorite babysitter was there. My grandmother’s and parent’s funerals were there. The thought of its demolition brought back a lot of memories. My favorite one was the annual school bazaar.

This excerpt is from a book I started writing about my childhood in Waterloo. I’ve never finished it but I think about it often.

St. Mary’s Annual School Bazaar

4th grade – 1961

“What did your mother make for the bazaar?” Debra whispers in my direction. She’s one of my classmates. Mass is over and we’re walking back to our classroom.

“She made two cakes for the cakewalk. A chocolate one and a pound cake,” I reply in a voice I hope won’t be overheard.

Debra answers just as softly, “Hmmmm! Sounds yummy. My mom made a few aprons with lace on the edges. They’re really pretty.”

“Girls,” Sister Norberta, who’s leading us, stops and glares in our direction, “talking in the hallway after Mass is forbidden.” How did she hear us? She turns back and continues her stately walk.

Valentine’s Day is tomorrow and today is the annual school bazaar, a one-day event, from around 11:30 to around 3:30 p.m., held to raise money for different school activities. The planning starts months in advance and everyone is expected to participate. A month before the bazaar all the students volunteer their mothers and fathers to make things to sell. Almost any homemade item is welcome – baked goods (the most important because they sell the best), crocheted place mats, lacy aprons, potholders, and other handicrafts.

The bazaar takes place in the gym in the school basement. The same gym is used for basketball games, phys ed classes, the Christmas program, plays, school recitals, 8th grade graduation ceremony, and the science fair. At last year’s Christmas play, Michael was the little drummer boy, playing a real drum and marching in rhythm through the gym and up onto the manger on the stage. This was a natural for him since he drums on every available surface at home.

The stage at the front of the gym is equipped with professional spot lights, black blackout curtains, and two heavy dark red velour stage curtains which close in the middle. Six steps on each side lead up to the stage, and there are two entry doors on either side of the stage at floor level. I’ve performed on that stage many times, either in real recitals or when Vicki on the piano and I on the violin improvise classical duets.

The kids in the older grades, with the help of some of the adults, are responsible for organizing the booths and the games. Besides booths selling all kinds of homemade goods, the bazaar traditionally includes a haunted house, an eighth grade student acting as fortune-teller, a bean-bag throw where you can win prizes, and a cakewalk held in the parish dining room once everybody has eaten lunch.

We file into the classroom and wait for the milk delivery so we can eat our breakfast. Sister Norberta doesn’t let us talk. We’re soon finished with breakfast and classes start.

First Reading, then math, and the time drags by. Sister has a real problem keeping us in control during the morning. I glance at my schoolmates and notice some kids are fidgeting in their seats. The seventh and eighth graders are already in the gym preparing the tables and booths, no classes for them this morning, and we can’t wait to see this year’s bazaar.

Soon I smell the odor of sloppy joes cooking in the parish kitchen which is across from the gym. I’m thinking about lunch rather than listening to my teacher. Last week we all bought our tickets for lunch – only 25 cents. Lunch is served in shifts with the younger grades going first. Some of the mothers, usually the same ones, are cooking for us. In addition to the sloppy joes there’ll be potato chips, a cupcake, and white or chocolate milk.

Only a few more minutes to go, but it seems like an eternity. Sister Norberta looks up from her arithmetic book at the clock on the back wall. “Okay, boys and girls,” she announces and closes her book. “We’ll stop here. There’s no homework for tomorrow. Please put your books and pencils in your desks. As soon as the bell rings we’ll go down to the gym. I remind you our turn for lunch is 12:15. So don’t be late. Does everyone have their ticket?”

Above the noise of books and papers being arranged in the desks is a general mumbling of yeses, and some of the kids stick their hands in their pants or uniform pockets to make sure they have their tickets. Mine is in my blouse pocket along with the $2 Mommy gave me to spend. The school bell rings.

“One more thing,” Sister shouts. The bell stops and she lowers her voice. “School and the bazaar end at 3:30. I’ll be back in the classroom so you can collect your coats.” Sister Norberta smiles, which is rare. “Have a good time. You can go now. See you at lunch.”

Her parting message delivered, we file out of the classroom, in a reasonably orderly manner, and down the red-painted cement steps leading to the gym. Kids are coming down from the other side, too.

This is not my first bazaar so I know more or less what to expect. I especially like the sloppy joes for lunch, the cakewalk and the haunted house. At the gym door, a lady is selling tickets for the different attractions. I’m only going to buy 50 cents worth – that will give me 10 tickets – and if I need more I’ll come back. I remind myself to save some money for popcorn balls and cotton candy.

The noise coming from inside is deafening. Over two hundred people standing at booths or walking around, students and assorted parents, talking and laughing, and the noise echoes off the gym’s concrete walls. Both sides of the gym are lined with tables covered with baked goods and handicrafts. We should raise a lot of money this year.

Once inside I look through the crowd searching for my siblings. Eventually I spot Jeanann standing behind the Ladies of the Altar booth looking quite official. She’s in 6th grade and joined the Ladies of the Altar this year. Since girls can’t serve Mass they let us clean the church and lay out the priest’s vestments for Mass. Not fair. I’d rather serve Mass than do some more housework at church. Plus you have to take a test to join the group.

I walk over to their table and start fingering a doily.

Jeanann slaps my hand. “Don’t touch anything unless you’re gonna buy it!”

“I don’t want that thing. I can make one myself. Anyway. I’m going to the haunted house.”

“What time are you supposed to eat lunch?”

“At 12:15.”

“Don’t be late. They won’t serve you.”

“I know.” With that typical big sister warning, which I ignore, I turn and walk toward the stage. Pinned on the closed curtains is a “Haunted House” sign decorated with drawings of skeletons, skulls and bats. I know this stage well and am looking forward to see how it’s been transformed this year.

There are several kids in line and I take my place behind them preparing two of my 5-cent tickets. The sound of screams and giggles pour out from behind the curtain.

Finally it’s my turn. I push back the curtain, poke my head in first to get used to the darkness, and walk inside. There are fake spider webs draped on the blackout curtains. Eerie music is playing in the background. I start my walk through the haunted house maze.

Suddenly, a grotesque figure, a seventh or eighth grader disguised in a King Kong costume, jumps into my path and just as quickly disappears. I scream and then laugh, knowing the scare was worth the 10 cent entrance fee. Moving on through the maze I make note of the decorations. They are the same ones we use at home for Halloween – black cats hanging from the ceiling, a witch or two on a broomstick, huge orange jack-o-lanterns, some plastic and some real ones made from pumpkins, lit up with candles. I wonder where they found pumpkins in February.

I finish my stroll through the not-so-scary haunted house. As I reach the exit, a ghost with his arms flapping up and down under a white sheet with holes cut out for the eyes and nose crosses my path. It lets out a mournful, pitiful screech which sounds more like a pig being stuck than a real ghost. I pretend to be afraid and jerk back away from this fake phantom. It disappears behind the curtain.

The afternoon is almost finished and I still haven’t been to the cakewalk. I only have two tickets left – just enough. I never win anything, but I’m going to try anyway. Music is drifting out from the dining room. As I approach the door the music stops, and is replaced by screams of delight come and chairs scrapping the floor as the kids try to claim their chair to win a prize. I hope Mommy’s cakes are gone. I don’t think she’d like me to bring them back home.

“That’ll be two tickets, please,” the girl at the door says to me. I recognize her as one of the eighth grade students. I hand her my tickets. She mumbles a thank you and asks me to wait until this round is over.

Accompanied by “Row, row, row your boat,” there are only two kids circling the only chair standing in the middle of the room. The music stops, and the taller boy falls into the seat first.

“I won, I won,” he yells. The shorter boy frowns, but he shakes the other boy’s hand and leaves the room. The taller boy, a kid from sixth grade, I think, goes over to the table to choose his cake.

Now my turn to play. There are eight of us and seven chairs. This might take a while. The music starts. I survive the first round, then the second, then the third and fourth. Now there are three of us and two chairs. Surprise! Now only me and another girl – a fifth grader, I think are in competition. The music starts up again, and even bigger surprise – I win!

“Yeah! I won!” There are only two cakes left sitting on the table, not one of which is Mommy’s. I choose a spice cake with white, glistening frosting, and which is in better condition than the orangish cake sitting next to it. First time I’ve ever won anything. My sisters and brothers are going to be happy.

I sit up in bed, start to feel woozy and my stomach hurts. Daddy is humming in the bathroom. Maybe if I don’t move for a few seconds the feeling will go away. Must have been something I ate at the bazaar. The sloppy joes or popcorn balls or cotton candy. The feeling doesn’t go away. I get out of bed and walk into the bathroom.

“Daddy, I don’t feel good,” I moan. He quickly turns his head to look at me and I throw up all over the bathroom floor.

“Oh, Theresa! Why didn’t you do that in the toilet?”

I feel really awful. “Cuz there wasn’t enough time!” I start crying.

“Stop crying. Let’s clean up this mess and you. I’ll give you something to stop the nausea. Then you go back to bed.”

I continue crying and help clean up my mess. No school for me this morning.

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Why did Kate do it?

27 Friday May 2016

Posted by Theresa Nash in Self-publishing

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crueltyoflove, The Cruelty of Love, writing

“The Cruelty of Love” prefaces with a quote from Alfred Lord Tennyson: “’Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.” Kate Johnson, the protagonist of the novel, should have read this before she began her campaign to confront her ex-boyfriends. Her ex-loves haunt her life and she acts.

The Cruelty of LoveKate denies she’s seeking revenge. She justifies her drastic actions by rationalizing that her exes need to be made aware of the self-doubt they awoke in her and the pain they inflicted on her. At the time of the actual break-ups Kate was too young, too inexperienced and too hurt to be able to explain her feelings in an intelligible manner. It wasn’t until many years later, and after time in therapy, that she understood and could actually verbalize what had gone wrong and why she had such a sense of betrayal and injustice.

Why would Kate – a successful career woman, admired and loved by her family and friends, respected by her colleagues, and seemingly happy with her life – risk so much? Did she get satisfaction from her illegal undertaking? Normal people don’t do such things. Or do they?

I’m sure that a lot of you have thought about confronting an ex about a heart-rending break-up, one that left you miserable and shedding tears for a long time – you’d finally get the chance to tell them what you think. I have, but would never have the courage to go to such lengths as did Kate. Everyone says “get over it,” “there are other fish in the sea,” or “move on.” I would agree with them.  But if I had written the book that way it wouldn’t be very interesting.

That’s one of the beauties of writing fiction – I can make my characters do what the ‘darker’ side of me would like to do. After reading “The Cruelty of Love” a friend wrote to me “That ‘darker’ side that you keep hidden away, should be allowed to flourish, be exposed to all and sundry, and let out of the closet!!!”

Fiction lets me expose my ‘darker’ side. So, I let Kate’s feelings stir up her darker side and let her set in motion an ingenious yet dangerous and illegal plan to confront Earl and Charles.

#crueltyoflove smarturl.it/tclo

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Il Molo = One woman + Two soulmates + the Italian seacoast + Crime

22 Sunday Mar 2015

Posted by Theresa Nash in Promotions, Self-publishing

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ilmolo, indie authors, writing

 “Il Molo = One woman + two soulmates + the Italian seacoast + crime” – I thank Writers’ Lens for coming up with this equation of Il Molo as the title of an interview I gave on the website (See post) . This is the final element of the equation of Il Molo.   

The scene of the crime… next to the bastion on the the Punta Crena.

la bastione

Although I love a well written book in almost any genre, the exception being science fiction, crime and thrillers remain my favorite. From John Grisham to Nicci French to Stieg Laarsen to Lee Child, the more crime and suspense the better – but not too much blood please.

In Il Molo, there is no blood, but there is a crime. A body on the beach of the spiaggetta. Who is it and why? In the dream version the mystery is never solved. This leaves Martha uneasy about the scenes she witnessed in her subconscious, especially when the dreams seem to become reality. In the real world, a crime of passion, one could say. A perceived sense of wrong, a too proud ego, a man who unjustly blames another.
OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

Why here? The possibility of a crime in this relatively peaceful vacation spot is what inspired Il Molo.

In July 2010, I was sitting on Varigotti’s beach engrossed in another crime novel. An Italian friend (who inspired one of the characters in Il Molo) came to join me on the beach. Noticing that I was reading another thriller, he asked me if I could write one. My reply was “why not?” I immediately thought of the little beach, the spiaggetta, under the Punta Crena and imagined a murder, or a suicide, a body found on the beach, a police investigation.  The spiaggetta, sinister and unwelcoming to me, was the perfect spot for crime. I could very well imagine someone falling from the cliff above. I added an inept investigation by the local police in the dream version and a surprise motive in the real version.

There are still some surprises but I can’t reveal everything. I hope these four posts have inspired you to read the book.

Il Molo  – available on Amazon, paperback and Kindle.

#ilmolo

 

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Il Molo = One woman + Two soulmates + the Italian seacoast

15 Sunday Mar 2015

Posted by Theresa Nash in Promotions, Self-publishing

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ilmolo, indie authors, writing

 “Il Molo = One woman + two soulmates + the Italian Seacoast + crime” – I thank Writers’ Lens for coming up with this equation of Il Molo as the title of an interview I gave on the website (See post) . This is the third element of the equation of Il Molo.

Ahh! Varigotti’s beach, spiaggia in Italian, is absolutely beautiful. In general the sea is clean, at least in the morning, and its western exposition means there is sun all day long. The beach is made up of tiny pebbles so you don’t have sand clinging to everything. Unfortunately the pebbles get really hot and by early afternoon it is impossible, at least for Martha, to walk on them.

Varigotti's beach

Martha and Carl take their annual summer vacation in Varigotti. For them it is the ideal vacation spot filled with many cherised memories. The splendid beach is not the only attraction. The small resort, frequented mostly by Italians, is nestled between the hills and the sea. The village is picturesque and worth exploring.

The couple have been coming here for so many years that they know a lot of vacationers, if not by name at least by face. Over the years, they have watched children grow into adults. These young adults have started their own families and have made Varigotti their preferred paradise.

the molo

The molo in high season.

The molo, from whence the name of my book, or jetty, juts out into the sea, turning about halfway at a slight angle. It is about two meters high and is lined with huge boulders. The existing molo was built to break up the waves that would otherwise slam on to the beach. The photo shows an aerial view of the molo from the cliffs above. Also one of the heading photos on my blog shows the molo seen from the beach.

Not far from Varigotti’s beach is the small beach known as the spiaggetta in Italian. The spiaggetta is in an alcove backed by a cliff named the Punta Crena upon which stands an abandoned guard tower and bastion. The beach can be reached by swimming, by boat, by paddleboat, or by climbing down the Punta Crena. This beach is the scene of the crime!

Il Molo  – available on Amazon, paperback and Kindle.

Stayed tuned for – Crime – #ilmolo

 

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Il Molo = One woman + Two soulmates

07 Saturday Mar 2015

Posted by Theresa Nash in Promotions, Self-publishing

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ilmolo, indie authors, writing

 “Il Molo = One woman + two soulmates + the Italian Seacoast + crime” – I thank Writers’ Lens for coming up with this equation of Il Molo as the title of an interview I gave on the website (See post) . This is the second element of the equation of Il Molo.   

Can you be romantically attracted to two people at the same time? Do you have several soulmates, with whom you could be happy and even marry? Marthacouple romantic deals with this eternal question in Il Molo. Carl, her husband, whom she’s been with for almost twenty years, and Bjorn, ten years her junior, whom she met on the ski slopes not long after her move to Geneva.

The first time she met Carl, a sculptor, was at a gallery opening in Geneva. The encounter was brief. Her second meeting was almost a year later and once again at an art show opening in Geneva. At the time she found him very attractive and charming. She took the risk and was glad that she did. It was Carl that introduced her to Varigotti.

On the slopesHer first encounter with Bjorn was also brief. And here is where Martha’s dream world distorts reality. She did meet him on the ski slopes when she went skiing with her then boyfriend. After that encounter she never Bjorn again. But…her dream world showed her another version and one that apparently held an important place in her subconscious.

When she runs into Bjorn in Italy her heretofore stable world is shaken. Even more so when she discovers that he may be a part of a tragic incident that took place in Varigotti at the beginning of that summer. Martha is confronted with her true feelings for Carl and Bjorn. Can she love two men at the same time? Could she have been happy with Bjorn?

Are these two men based on real people? I already answered this concerning Carl in the previous post. As for Bjorn? I am not at liberty to say.

Il Molo  – available on Amazon, paperback and Kindle.

Stay tuned for – the Italian seacoast – #ilmolo

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Il Molo = One woman

27 Friday Feb 2015

Posted by Theresa Nash in Promotions, Self-publishing

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ilmolo, indie authors, writing

“Il Molo = One woman + two soulmates + the Italian Seacoast + crime” – I thank Writers’ Lens for coming up with this equation of Il Molo as the title of an interview I gave on the website (See post).  The next four posts will delve a bit into each of the parts of the equation of Il Molo.   

Martha Nathan, the protagonist of Il Molo, is an expat living in Geneva Switzerland. This year she is enjoying her traditional summer vacation in Varigotti, Italy on the Ligurian seacoast, reading, relaxing and swimming in the beautiful Mediterranean.  She has some doubts about her career and her love for her husband. Being naturally optimistic and positive she tries not to let these doubts interfere with her vacation.

Dreams are an important part of Martha’s psyche. She dreams every night. Sometimes she remembers the scenario that she lived in her subconscious but most of the time only vague sensations or snippets stay with her once she wakes up.  Her fear is that the dreams are premonitory. She would prefer them not to be girl on beachand would rather have them be only a reflection of incidents she experienced during the day. Her dreams are an integral part of Il Molo and lead the reader to the action that unfolds in Part II.

I will let you in on a little secret. The character of Martha (my mother’s name) is based on me, sometimes the real me and sometimes the imagined me. I have been living in Geneva since 1979, working in finance, and my husband and I do take our yearly summer vacation in Varigotti. I dream almost every night – fantastic, absurd, and sometimes scarily realistic dreams. I remember the dreams the first thing in the morning, but unfortunately, as my senses become assaulted by reality, the only thing left of my nighttime scenarios is a vague impression of what transpired.

Martha’s husband Carl is also based on a real person – my husband – who is an artist, a painter. One of his paintings graces the cover of the book. Carl’s approach to the world as related in the book is also real. For that I consider myself lucky. Most of the other characters are based loosely on friends and acquaintances.

Why did I decide to be so realistic in Il Molo? Because it was appropriate to the development of the story.

Il Molo  – available on Amazon, paperback and Kindle.

Stay tuned for – Two soulmates – #ilmolo

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SheWrites – networking site for women writers

27 Monday Oct 2014

Posted by Theresa Nash in Marketing, Networking

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indie authors, networking, writing

I discovered a networking website for women writers: http://www.shewrites.com/

“Welcome to She Writes, the largest community of women writers online. She Writes is your place to find community, and all of our place to foster it. Whether you’re well published, just starting out, a novelist, journalist, blogger, memoirist, screenwriter, poet, playwright, agent, editor, or publicist, this guide offers a number of ways to maximize your use of She Writes.”

I’ve just joined so I’m still feeling my way around. But all networking and marketing outlets can be useful. And it may be useful for you.

 

 

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Am I a writer?

26 Friday Sep 2014

Posted by Theresa Nash in Uncategorized

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Il Molo, self-publishing, writing

After I self-published my first book, “Il Molo”, several friends asked me if I had always written? I often wanted to respond facetiously and say “No, only since the first grade.” However, I refrained myself because I knew that was not the answer they were looking for, nor the question they had asked. They were really asking if I considered myself an author.

The answer is not so easy. My “writing” background is eclectic. When I was a teenager I started a James-Bond-like novel in one of my school notebooks. Now I wish I could find the manuscript and work on it again. I am sure it was thrown out a long time ago. In a high school English course covering the short story as a literary genre, our daily homework assignment was to write a two or three page short story. I do remember concocting literary gems in the morning on the school bus. I have written innumerable proposals, two or three articles for a United Nations organization in Geneva, and numerous satirical articles for a clandestine in-house newsletter for which I was one of the editors.

Am I an author? That depends on one’s definition. Only time will tell. If no one buys my stories, then I guess the answer is clear. However, I have promised myself that I will keep writing. I don’t write every day, but I do think about writing every day. When I find the solution to a stumbling block in the narrative, then I start writing again. As I write other things come to mind, and I continue until the idea well runs dry.

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Il Molo

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